Random Thoughts. . .with direction

I have been posting some comments to a blog I love to visit the writer asks thought provoking questions, I've been answering and realized I wanted to keep those thoughts where I could find them. So I'm going to cut and paste and put them here too. I may or may not add in a brief synopsis of the questions posted and I may or may not expound upon my thoughts immediately but I do need to keep them and have them to read again. Thanks Cheryl for making me think.

On Waiting for Blessings and Answered Prayers
9/21-Oh boy can I say amen to the waiting. I've been 'in waiting' (not the pregnant kind) for a few certain blessings and prayers to be answered for what seems like forever.

And every time I start to feel like I'm not being heard the answer has come loud and clear, "I know what you need and I'm working on it." In the mean time I'm learning so much, I've realized that in the waiting periods of life, I've grown the most and gained the most trust for my Heavenly Father and his plan for my life. And occasionally I've been granted an exceptional amount of 'keep me busy work' to help pass the time.

I was released from YW's 3 years ago, I was so sad. I discovered I was pregnant the day of our last Girl's Camp visit. And I knew it was time for something different.

I didn't get a calling until 4 months ago. That is such a long period to go without a calling (for me) but it was necessary and helpful and I had lots of opportunities to serve. Then, I was given Nursery and Cub Scouts all in the same Sunday, Yikes!


On Depression and Blogging the bad times
It's a fine line between sympathy, for a miserable illness that makes you feel nutty ,and allowing yourself to wallow in self pity. A place that for me only gets deeper the longer I allow myself to stay.

As a depressed person, I'm not as clearly able to see that line and waltzing right over it is a cinch.

Being able to explain away those feelings makes you see clearly what in your minds eye is often, too often a jumbled up mess. Thinking out loud to a friend be it online or in person can help make sense of those things.

And for those of us who love you too, it's venting, it's thinking out loud, it's trying to figure out what all those thoughts are doing to your emotional health. It is not complaining at all.

I think that if most people knew what depression felt like there would be more empathy and understanding and less judgment and criticism. And that in turn would make it easier to deal with the depression monster.

1:47 PM, September 18, 2008